The Visit

So many emotions mingle together. Relief leads the pack but, it's closely followed by a nervous excitement. It's all okay, it's going to be okay and, well, maybe even fun. There will be ups and downs, hills not mountains I hope. There will be good days and bad days and things may get rocky sometimes but, I know in my heart it will all be okay.

She and are I are very different but, we do have some things in common. We both love to talk, tell stories and laugh. She is very funny and she has a good heart. She loves children even if she parents so much differently than I do.

How hard this must be for her. The feelings she has to over come, the anger and jealousy. I can't imagine what it would be to watch others raise your children. Four different homes, four different families with different ideals, values and boundaries. She has come so far, learned so much. Still, this has to be so difficult and so painful.

We greeted each other with a hug. Gypsy has the right idea about hugs. Then, we moved to sit at the kitchen table. The kitchen is my haven. I feel it's the heart of a home, not a house maybe, but certainly of a home. We sat, we talked and we laughed. I told her about the kids visit to the mountains. What they are doing there and the new friends they have made. She told me about the visits she had with the other the other children and their new families. Soon, the children's worker arrived but the conversation stayed about the same.

The visit lasted nearly two hours. The little ones watched a movie in their oldest sister's room with her supervising. I know it made her happy to know both her moms were below her talking and learning to trust each other. She came down to make sandwiches for lunch as the worker and her mom were preparing to leave. She gave hugs, chatted for a few minutes and said good bye. They will see each other again in a week. She seems content.

Hikes in the autumn to see the leaves turn, cookie baking in the winter and visits to the park in spring. So much to look forward to, a new member of the family. Like the children grew in my heart so too is their mother. The woman that gave them life and then loved them so desperately she chose to give them a family that she could not. I am grateful to her, in awe of what it must have taken to make the choice she did. The greatest gift she could, the gift of sacrifice that only comes from true and unconditional love.